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daanopperman
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re: Jokes

Post by daanopperman »

2 old friends were sitting on a park bench the whole morning when one stood up and said
" I have to go for a walk , my cheeks is sleeping "
Where upon his friend replied

" Yes , I've heard it snoring a couple of time's "



A golfer took a bus to the driving range with his pockets stuffed with golfballs .
A young woman sitting opposite him kept on looking at his knobbly pants .
After he became very embarrassed he looked her in the eye and said
" Its golf balls "
Very empathetic she asked him
" is it anything as bad as tennis elbows "


3 Old friends decided to consult a shrink about their loss in memory .

The shrink asked the first one
" How much is 3x3 "
275 replied the man .
The shrink shook his head .
He asked the second the same which replied
Wednesday .
The shrink shook his head .
Same question to the third which replied 9

The shrink asked then man how did you come to that answer
Oh that was easy he said
I just subtracted 275 from Wednesday .
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Wubbly
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Post by Wubbly »

...
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daanopperman
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re: Jokes

Post by daanopperman »

IRT Gill's crapping on the ceiling

Which Chinese author wrote the novel CRAP ON THE WALL

Whu Flung Dung .
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Post by rlortie »

dann,

You reminded me of some of my most read books when I was young!

"Under the Grandstands" by Seymour Butts.
"Yellow River" By I P Freely.
"Upside down female pilot has crackup" by Tit Hung Low.
"Chinese couple have White Baby" by Some Ting Wong.
Hmserebus
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re: Jokes

Post by Hmserebus »

Confucius he say -

Man with rooster in freezer , got frozen cock .
No Data - No Problem
Hmserebus
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re: Jokes

Post by Hmserebus »

He also say -

Virgin in bed --one prick ,-- all gone !
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daanopperman
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re: Jokes

Post by daanopperman »

A guy approached his boss and request's leave . The boss asks him " So where you are planning to go on holiday ? " . The guy replies " I was thinking of taking the family to San Jose " . The boss days " As a matter of fact , it is actually pronounced San Hose "
When would you like to take leave ? .
The guy replied , " In Hune and Huly if that is OK with you " .
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Post by AB Hammer »

A little boy asked his dad: Does Rudolph 's nose really glow so bright?

His dad said: Yes it does, and has shown the way for Santa every Christmas.

The little boy then asked: Does his snot glow to?
"Our education can be the limitation to our imagination, and our dreams"

So With out a dream, there is no vision.

Old and future wheel videos
https://www.youtube.com/user/ABthehammer/videos

Alan
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Jim Williams
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Post by Jim Williams »

(Borrowed from another joke)

Question: How many perpetual motion machine builders does it take to change a light bulb?

Answer: That's not funny.
Make up reality
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Wubbly
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Post by Wubbly »

They would first claim that it is not impossible to change the light bulb.
Then they would have to have a discussion whether or not it would violate any laws of physics.
Some would say momentum would be required to change the light bulb.
Others would argue it from the energy perspective.
A few polls later, a consensus would be reached that light bulbs are able to be changed.
Some would try to simulate changing the light bulb using simulation software while others might build a real world model of how a light bulb might be changed, if it were in fact possible.
The model would fail.
The simulation may or may not actually work.
If the simulation worked, some would argue that it is a bug in the software.
Some might build excel spreadsheets, while others drew pictures using a clumsy paint program that showed nothing of value.
Some jokes might be shared, some arguments would ensue, maybe even some friendships created.
In the end, no light bulb would be changed.
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Jim Williams
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Post by Jim Williams »

I'm astonished the builders never did change it, after how much they changed each other.
Make up reality
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Fletcher
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Post by Fletcher »

One PMM builder fed up with the avalanche of competing hypothesis and theory being bandied about had a brilliant but simple light bulb moment. He flicked the wall switch and lo-and-behold the light came on. After extensive discussion by all present it was mutually agreed that the problem had been successfully solved without the need for reverse engineering, and that after a suitable period of time a paper would be published ratified by at least 51% present.
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Post by ovyyus »

... again.
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murilo
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Post by murilo »

Yes... That was a real long and boring train ride...

Hours and hours... like years... even if that train was a new 50's type...

Front to front, two guys: one clean, old and elegant very old man... front at another younger normal and current guy...

Sounds, shakes, dust and fume...

The old man, with a small bag at side, from time to time, takes a 1 liter bottle, covered by a paper bag.

With great discretion, he takes the tap and take a shy drink of that large glass, before to keep it back to the bag.

The shy younger became almost mad of curiosity, plus the alcohol drink impulse! Almost mad!!!!

Now he sees the old was sleeping, deeply...

And he saw at a curve, there was coming a tunnel... a dark tunnel...

He calculated the movements with indeed clever fast art...

In the total dark of tunnel, he took the bottle... took the tap... and got a large drink... a plenty drink...

BUT, what a drink is this????

A hell drink???? What taste and smell is this????

Naturally he got confused and still absolutely curious!

After this, he started a talk with the old respectable man, and finally he asked about what drink was that!?!?!?

Then the innocent man started to tell him about...

''Ho, dear... this is isn't absolutely a drink, or a cocktail... absolutely... you see... I wish it would... unfortunately... I'm at last stage tuberculosis sickness... and sometimes I have to spit... you see... too much saliva and blood...''

------ -------- ---------
This joke is dedicated to special sociopaths guys, inside and/or outside our forum!
Yes! Many, just like all brazilian politicians, think that they can get everything they want, reach or take... B]
Please have a Merry Christmas, great indeed according your deserving!
Best wishes!
Murilo
Any intelligent comparison with 'avalanchedrive' will show that all PM turning wheels are only baby's toys!
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re: Jokes

Post by rlortie »

I believe it was once assumed that after great trial and tribulation, it would take five members to change a light bulb.

After arriving at a consensus that indeed the bulb was burned out and the switch was operative. Five were required. One to climb the ladder with new bulb, four would turn the ladder. First counter clockwise to unscrew the bad bulb, then clockwise to install the new one.

This of course is after six pages of why, what, how, and where the new bulb was manufactured. including numerous links to unrelated items and You Tube video's.

Hope this helps as it took great effort, appears my ceiling light is burned out!

Ralph
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