When I'm not solving the PM thing...

[rmd3]

Hi everyone,

It's been a while since I've visited (but that doesn't mean I'm not working on solving the PM thing). Time is tight these days. So if you can help me out, I really appreciate you taking the time to do so.

Below is a sales page I've yet to make public (I guess this is public, isn't it?), and before I start getting the word out on a grand scale, I'm trying to get some feedback about the sales page.

So today, I need some help, assistance, and advice from non-marketing people. I've asked internet marketing types, but I sometimes I get the impression that they are answering from textbooks and not "the gut". I really want non-marketers to give me their impressions.

http://www.springcircuits.com/printout_secrettoy.htm

So let me know your overall impression, what's good and what's bad, what's believable and not believable, what's strong and what needs more proof to convince a buyer, and any constructive criticism would be appreciated.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
-Randall

P.S. The URL will change to something that makes more sense when it goes public (unless everyone says it rots - then it may never go public no matter what the URL).

P.P.S. Did you know copywriters put in "P.S." because, I guess, they always get read. Send me an email if you didn't read this. Ha ha.

P.P.P.S. For the record, I think I solved the PM issue on August 23, 2008 but, like always, it takes time to build the working model. For some reason, although my wife listened a bit more intently when I told her this time, she still needs to see the wheel turn just to be sure. Go figure.

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edit: I forgot to mention that it is incomplete, and I wanted to get feedback before the final version is done. (maybe that was implied?)

[rlortie]

Waaaay to long!

IMO:

To much patting yourself on the back and third party input. You are not selling a product, but attempting to sell yourself on the product.

Build a better mouse trap and the world will beat a path to your door. Let the product sell itself and keep the advertising blunt and to the point. IMO such an ad should be short and sweet so that one does not have to scroll to read it all.

Link to several pages each covering a single topic, such as review comments, another for explanation of usage etc...

Attached is a couple of samples of marketing links that I consider well thought out and to the point. They both contain thousands of items yet easy to navigate through. Simplicity in ordering and explanations of each groupings as to what is compatible with what.

http://www.mcmaster.com/
http://www.use-enco.com/CGI/INSRHM

Ralph

[DrWhat]

Good to also show a photo of a young one and his dad using it with a BIG smile on the child's face.

Emotion sells things too.

[ovyyus]

Hi Randall, I thought the page was OK in terms of delivering the information. However, I think there might be a little too much unbroken text - it's a bit dry. I'd like to see the use of more graphics to break up the info and help maintain visual interest.

The product is obviously designed for kids, so why not show the potential customer, parents, some happy kids using your product? People do tend to buy on emotion, not logic.

Also, I think you should display a strong product packaging design right up front with your product introduction and overview. A good product box design can be a powerful marketing tool by helping a customer connect with and understand your product more quickly - if most people have the attention span of a goldfish, then you've only got about 4 seconds :D

[rmd3]

Great suggestions. Keep 'em coming!

Ralph, while I've used McMaster to order things, I only use it to look for things I already know about. So I'm not sure how it would fit with those formats you suggested.

I was thinking my sales page would be a landing page from a search by parents searching for an electronic kit for their kid (or grandparents for their grandkids). I want to educate them about SpringCircuits so they know what they are getting and why they should choose SpringCircuits over something else (and of course, make the sale).

I'll probably test a short page against this page to see which pulls better.

Don't be surprised if you see some of my happy kids with their loving father, yours truly, on that page (or the official page) in the near future!

Bill, You know I did write text less clumped together initially. I'll try to revisit that.

Thanks - you guys are really helping me out here.
-Randall

[trevie]

Not bad, dont like it all on one page it will probably scare most people off and I would go else where, A bold link menu on the left would help to break it up on to different pages thus helping to navigate to different sections of the website that people want to read, scrolling through tons of crap is not good. get rid of the scroll bar. everything must fit onto one page.

example of a menu.

Introduction
Product Introduction.
product specifications.
Learning modules.
purchasing options.
contact address.
about me.
Index.
Search.
etc etc.

when you done that, I will re-review it..

[murilo]

Randall, hi!
The most important you have in hands: a good product, besides I couldn't see the price. The connection idea using the springs is great!

Your market is all around, outside there!

It's easy to evaluate the efforts you have done to make this site.

To be a web disigner is not a simple stuff, since LOTS of knowledge must be used and programed all together.

Many professionals you find as web designers are in fact technicians and engineers. In therms of communication they are a bit crude, innocent and too simplist; even amateurs.

The ideal web designer SHOULD have ALSO propaganda, advertise, communication to people and arts expertises!! A kind of ''packet'' that includes creativity and commercial fealling!

Case you want to try again, I can introduce you to one, in Atlanta. If you care about where he is born, he's a brazilian, in the US since 2000.

At any time, I can send you his site for a previous visit.

I wish you the best success!
Best regards.
Murilo

[rmd3]

Trevie & Murilo,

Thank you for the input - more to think about.

-Randy

[murilo]

OK.
My invitation to met this professional is valid for any other forum member, inventors, friends or relatives, or girl-friends, neighbors, colleages, books salesmen, diletants und so weiter...
Cheers! M.

[rmd3]

Finally, I got the sales page updated and managed to rework the site a bit.
It was a combo of feedback from many people that led me to this result.

You can see it at: www.springcircuits.com

Anyway, thanks for the feedback everyone,
Randall

PS. You are always welcome to give more feedback, if you'd like - but I've got to focus on getting the word out now. Thanks again.

[trevie]

Still needs some modification in some areas, It was difficult to locate the Home page link, it was so small, place it within the menu bar on all pages. A Menu should be visible on all pages to keep the website consistent and easy to navigate (static menu will help, if the pages can be scrolled). Draw up a Navigation tree (flow chart) to highlight where there maybe missing links and will help you design the navigation process easier. The words 'show me all the cool stuff' doesn't say where I will be going other than it maybe cool. maybe a link should say 'Product package contents'. Index at the foot of each page would be fairly useful to show the full website contents.